Some lame monologue

Just found out that I'm better in drawing than writing. What am I talking about, I knew that I am better in drawing than writing like decades ago. Someone even said to me that I'll probably be a top scorer in an art college. That reminds me of the reason why I enter this college. I was weak in writing you see. And I can't recall from where did I get the idea of, to be good in communication, you must first be good in language. Well, partially true, even though now I know language is not everything. So I made my own decision to polish up my language here. Although I have complains about my college asking us to write too much rather than teaching us more about real communications, but that is what I wanted at the beginning, to learn to write better. I spoke to this person last night regarding my result in school. On the paper, it looks as though as I did not make any improvement at all. This thing always bothers me. Every semester, no matter how hard I worked, I still get the same damn result. Then this person asked me what grade I think I deserve, and I confidently said I deserve at least a D (distinction). Although my writing is not perfect, but I can honestly say that I have improve so much, and it's good enough to tell the stories in my mind. (Try reading my earlier post.. you'll know what I mean). So he said, 'then you have already got a D for yourself'. The paper does not show my effort, nor my improvement. A grade is just what one lecturer's opinion. Well, I remember painting some art work that I think is ugly and the rest of the world think that it's extraordinarily awesome. My opinion, it's still not good enough. The point is, what matters most is still what I think for myself. I do know the fact that my future employer will most probably look at that paper and judge me by it first. The only way to get through it is, 'make them don't look at the papers'. That's what I should be learning, the real communication, even without the bombastic English. Please don't misunderstand that I am turning into the most ignorant person in the world. I just need to quit inferiority and self pity in me and be proud but humble of my achievements.